I promised I’d never have a little girl who loved princesses. What was I thinking?
She took to them with no influence from me whatsoever, and suddenly I was invited to an unfamiliar magical realm of tiaras, gowns, and sparkly jewelry. This glamorous epitome of a three-year-old girl’s ideal.
It soon became clear (when she asked to wear dresses and costume jewelry every day) that she believed one couldn’t be a princess without wearing those things. But it’s been our mission to engrain a requisite association between princesses and traits like kindness to others and unconditional love and bravery and joy. Fortunately there are many illustrations of these qualities threaded in her stories.
When Jaime suggested the FACE.me blog tour, it got me thinking about some of the engrained requisites women have. While my three-year-old daughter’s stories illustrate positive, enriching values for the most part, I think teenagers and adults aren’t so lucky. Just look at the ideals communicated by pop culture and the multimillion-dollar beauty industry. The fact that plastic surgery is about as common as going to the dentist these days.
Wearing makeup is like a revered rite of passage for young girls. And once they cross that threshold, it’s hard for them to go out in public without it. Without their best face. I think that, instead of allowing it to accentuate their existing beauty in a fun way, which I’m all for, many allow the mask of makeup to create overshadowing flaws. To alter the lens of how they see themselves in the mirror. Without a few coats of mascara, they believe their eyes disappear. Without blush, their complexion is ghastly. Without a daily application from their proven assortment of tubes and compacts, they’re not beautiful. Not worth a second glance.
I don’t ever want my daughter to feel that way. I want her to see in herself the beauty I do, untouched in those big sapphire eyes and creamy skin and little petal smile that has the power to turn the darkest of days on its head. And more importantly, I want her to appreciate the innate kindness and generosity that radiates from within her. To know that every time her first reaction is to compliment someone she meets or comfort someone who’s hurt — those things are way more important to the blueprint of her identity than the shape of her eyes or the color of her hair.
And she, the first person who sees me after I drag myself out of bed in the morning, has helped me appreciate my own beauty in its raw and rugged form. Her mind doesn’t differentiate between my made-up face and this one. She’s looking for comfort, checking to see if she’s made me laugh, and measuring my delight in her. There are far more important things that matter to her than color and lines.
Isn’t that the way God looks at us, though? I think He completely sees through any attempt to dress ourselves up, to embellish any aspect of our life. He sees the real version of us and redeems us anyway.
And I think He wants us to know that there’s nothing we can do (or not do) to make Him love us more or less. Like a three-year-old, He is enraptured by us — bedheaded, broken, and blemished — just as we are.
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For more thoughts on true beauty and God’s love, check out the rest of the FACE.me blog tour by clicking the links below.
Nick Kording: http://nickkording.com/thoughts/…
Lindsay Harrel: http://www.lindsayharrel.com
Joseph Courtemanche: http://www.commotioninthepews.com
Gabrielle Meyer: http://www.gabriellemeyer.com
Jaime Wright: http://coffeecupsandcamisoles.blogspot.com
Carrie Wisehart: http://www.carriewisehart.com
Emilie Anne Hendryx: http://eahendryx.blogspot.com
Andrea ‘Dia’ Nell: http://andrea-michelle-wood.blogspot.com/
Sarah Baker: http://godbooksandchocolate.blogspot.com/?m=1
Kristy Cambron: http://www.kristycambron.com
Rachel Britz: http://www.rachelbritz.com
Cara Putman: http://www.caraputman.com
Stacy Monson: http://www.Landof10000words.wordpress.com
Laurie Tomlinson: http://www.laurietomlinson.com
Katherine Reay : http://www.katherinereay.com
Katie Ganshert: http://katieganshert.com/blog/
I think you’re gorgeous! Loved this. I think our litle princesses are beautiful just like God made them. My daughter is at the age she wears make up. I’m thankful she at least knows how to apply it without looking like Ursula the sea witch. 🙂
Thank you! Sounds like you’ve taught her well. I wear a little makeup most days — definitely not opposed to it, only the lie that people aren’t beautiful without it! <3
Love your beautiful smile! And the fact you’re teaching your daughter to be beautiful by example.
Thank you 🙂 <3 <3 <3
LOVE LOVE LOVE!
Likewise!
Great post Laurie! Thanks for sharing 🙂
You bet!
I loved this… especially that our children see as God does. Somewhere along the way, we lose His eyes and gain the world’s. Encourages me to make sure my kids keep seeing the world as He does – and see people as He does – as beautiful!
So important to invest in our kids and communicate this!
I couldn’t agree more! Great post, Laurie!
Stunning! I <3 the pic. of you with your little princess – made me tear up!
Thank you! I love how the bond of motherhood compels us to feel that for each other 🙂
First, let me say you are stunning without a stitch of makeup! But really what I wanted to stop and say was how much I love this post and especially this line: “To know that every time her first reaction is to compliment someone she meets or comfort someone who’s hurt — those things are way more important to the blueprint of her identity than the shape of her eyes or the color of her hair.” And also this part: “Without a few coats of mascara, they believe their eyes disappear. Without blush, their complexion is ghastly. Without a daily application from their proven assortment of tubes and compacts, they’re not beautiful.” Amen! It is so sad, especially hearing it come from young girls who so quickly, overnight it seems, have come to believe these things.
Thank you! And thanks for the specific feedback. My love language appreciates that hehe 🙂 I hope the culture of young girls changes for the better. Maybe we can do something about it 😉
Love how you’re raising your daughter, Laurie. So, so, SO important. I hope other young moms are doing the same!
This makes my mama heart so happy to hear! All I can do is my best, right? 🙂
Do you know how much I freaking you love, sister?!?!
Right. back. atcha. So much love for my Jaimes <3 Thanks for putting this together, by the way!
Love this, love you!
My husband and I think it’s so interesting how little girls gravitate toward princesses and dress up,and dolls while boys naturally seem to go for trucks, cars and sports. We’ve seen this in our own two grandchildren, a 4 yr old girl and a 2 yr old boy.
I seem to react to the outside beauty of a person before I get to know the person inside. I knew our former pastor before he was a pastor and he had a reputation of dating only the beautiful, popular girls. When we visited a church in our area for the first time I was surprised to find that he was the pastor. I was even more surprised when I saw his wife. She was not strikingly beautiful at all. She was actually quite “homely” looking to me and I sort of snickered to myself. Over the next few months I got to know her really well and knowing her inside beauty made her outside appear beautiful to me also. Amazing, huh?
My girl is the kind who will play with trucks and chase after a ball in her wand and tutu 🙂 And I totally get what you mean about outward appearances. I have tried not to pay attention or judge based on outward appearances, but that’s just how society engrains us. The important, rewarding thing is giving people the chance to reveal a gem after a less than favorable first impression, whether that has to do with appearance or not!
Your words are so eloquent, Laurie. Well said! Your little princess is one blessed girl. 🙂